Is Joint Custody BEST For Children : California Divorce

Divorce can be an emotionally challenging process, especially when children are involved. However, there is a growing understanding of the benefits of joint 50/50 custody arrangements for children.

This is a discussion with Leslie Holt who is a Co-Parenting coach and we explore her insights highlighting the importance of joint custody and the need for more research in this area.

Divorce Coaching: Focusing on the End Goal

Divorce coaching is a valuable support system that helps individuals navigate the complexities of divorce. Unlike traditional therapy, divorce coaching looks beyond the past and focuses on who one wants to become after the divorce.

It encourages individuals to envision their desired relationship with their ex-spouse and the type of co-parent they aspire to be. By working towards these goals, divorce coaching provides a guiding light during the challenging divorce process.

The Power of Joint 50/50 Custody

One of the key insights shared by Lesie is the significance of joint 50/50 custody arrangements. Unlike the traditional every-other-weekend visitation model, joint custody allows both parents to actively participate in their children’s lives. It promotes shared responsibilities, enabling a balanced approach to parenting.

Research suggests that joint custody can have a positive impact on children’s well-being, providing them with a sense of stability, love, and support from both parents.

The Need for More Research

Despite the potential benefits, there is a surprising lack of research on 50/50 custody arrangements. Leslie’s personal journey, having experienced the benefits of joint custody firsthand, has fueled her passion for understanding its impact.

Through her doctoral dissertation, she aims to collect data from adults who grew up in 50/50 custody arrangements.

By exploring their perspectives, she hopes to shed light on the long-term effects and the overall success of such arrangements.In addition to her research, the coach has authored a book that challenges the societal stereotypes surrounding single mothers. Titled “Not Mary, Not Roe,” the book addresses the experiences of those who don’t fit the extremes of the Virgin Mary or Jane Roe archetypes. It encourages individuals to find their place in the world, embracing their unique journeys and defying societal expectations.

Unlocking happiness for children during and after divorce is a vital goal for parents. The power of joint 50/50 custody arrangements cannot be underestimated, as they allow both parents to play active roles in their children’s lives.

However, more research is needed to fully understand the long-term effects of such arrangements. The work of divorce and co-parenting coaches, like the one discussed in this blog post, is essential in supporting families and promoting healthier co-parenting dynamics.

By striving for positive outcomes and challenging societal norms, we can create a brighter future for children of divorce.

5 Tips To Ensure You Have An Amicable California Divorce

5 Tips To Ensure You Have An Amicable California Divorce

It is possible to divorce amicably and without a court battle. An uncontested divorce in California is not only less expensive but also much faster than a contested divorce. It can also be less stressful for both parties involved, as it avoids the need for long court hearings and trial dates.

Divorce can be a stressful and overwhelming experience. It is important to understand your rights and obligations under California divorce law before filing for divorce, so that both parties are aware of the process ahead of time.

Fortunately, there are ways to make the divorce process amicable and uncontested in California. In this blog post, we will discuss five tips on how to have an amicable divorce in California, including discussing divorce in advance, understanding legal rights and obligations under divorce law, agreeing on property division matters, settling custody issues appropriately, and addressing spousal or child support payments. By following these tips you can ensure that your divorce goes as smoothly as possible.

Watch The Video Below…

Tip 1: Discuss divorce in advance

Make sure to have a lot of good communication before filing for divorce, so that both parties are aware that divorce is imminent and can begin preparing for it. If you want an amicable divorce, avoid making it a surprise at all costs.

2: Understand your rights and obligations under California divorce law

Before you file anything with the court, make sure you understand the divorce laws so you can make informed decisions. This does not mean that you are going to court, but having an understanding of how the process works will allow you to reach a fair agreement.

Tip 3: Discuss the issues that need to be addressed

Before filing for divorce, make sure you discuss matters such as property division, custody and spousal/child support. These conversations should take place in a respectful manner, so that everyone is aware of what needs to happen and can come up with agreeable solutions.

Tip 4: Discuss your finances and look at your assets and debts

Attempt to figure out how they should best be divided fairly between you. This is a key part of divorce, as it’s important that both parties are financially secure after divorce proceedings have been finalized as best as possible.

Tip 5: If you have an amicable divorce then a divorce attorney is not required

You can save thousands of dollars in attorney fees by using a less costly option such as a legal document assistant that specializes in the divorce process. A legal document assistant can help with paperwork and ensuring all divorce-related documents are filled out correctly, file them with the court and ensure a smooth process.

Divorce is never easy, but it doesn’t have to be a drawn out and contentious process. If you and your spouse are on the same page about divorce proceedings, an amicable divorce could be the best option for both of you.

An uncontested divorce in California can save time, money, and stress by avoiding long court hearings and trial dates.

Here at, we specialize in amicable divorce cases anywhere in California and would love to assist you with your divorce. Please use the link above to schedule a free consultation with us today to see how we can help. We look forward to hearing from you!

6 Month Cooling Off Period | Santa Clarita Divorce

6 Month Cooling Off Period | Santa Clarita Divorce

The question we get a lot at Divorce661 is regarding the 6 month cooling off period when it comes to divorce in California.

The question specifically is “do we have to wait the 6 months if we have already been separated for a period of time?”

It makes sense to me also that if you have been separated, say for 6 months or longer the chance of you reconciling with your spouse are probably dwindling.

Why The 6 Month Cooling Off Period Exists

That is the whole point behind the 6 month cooling off period in California. They want to provide an opportunity for the spouses to get back together before the divorce is finalized.

So why make couples wait if they’ve already been apart for as long as the court would require them had they still been living together.

Some of our clients have been separated for years, some as long as 20 years before filing for divorce.

This happens for a variety of reasons…

But to answer the question, Yes – you still have to wait the 6 months even if you have been separated.

The length of separation has no bearing on the final divorce date.

What starts the 6 months is the filing of the divorce and then the actual date that paperwork is SERVED.

How To Finalize Your Divorce Faster

So if you are in a hurry to have your divorce finalized, the best thing you can do is have the divorce paperwork served shortly after you have filed it.

What I tell our clients who find themselves in this position is that it has already been XXX number of years since they’ve been separated, what is another 6 months going to matter.

It really doesn’t, but I get it – once you decide it is time to file for divorce, you want it over and done with as quickly as possible.

what happens after FL-165 filed california divorce

What Happens After FL-165 Is Filed? |

What Happens After FL-165 Is Filed? |

You filed your request to enter default form FL-165, but what happens after the FL-165 is filed?

The Request To Enter Default form FL-165 is a form that is signed by the petitioner when you are going through either a true default or default with written agreement type California divorce case.

The word default simply means that no response was filed and therefore that party, the respondent has defaulted by not appearing in the case.

This is not a bad thing if this was the intention of the parties.

For instance, with our clients, we purposely and strategically file our divorce judgements as a default with written agreement.

We do this to save our clients money.  We work with both parties on their amicable divorce.

What a lot of people don’t know is that by filing the response form it triggers another court filing fee.

What Happens After FL-165 Is Filed?

But the real purpose for this article was to explain what happens after the FL-165 is filed.

This depends on a few things.


If you have an amicable California divorce and intentionally filed the request to enter default then the filing of the FL-165 simply means that the court is beginning to process your judgment.

This assumes that you filed your request to enter default FL-165 along with your judgment package as we recommend.

If you filed your request to enter default FL-165 as a separate document then once the default is entered you can now submit your judgment.

But there really is no reason to break them up into separate filings.

The type of case described above is called a Default with written agreement.


But what if your case is not amicable?

If your case is not amicable and you are contesting the terms of the divorce petition you’d normally want to file your response within the allotted time.

This prevents the request to enter default from being filed in the first place.

Some respondents for one reason or another don’t get their response filed in time and the request to enter default FL-165 ends up getting filed.

This has the result of blocking you from filing a Response.

There is a cure for this. You can file a motion to set aside the request to enter default and in my experience the court will generally approve this request.

Then you can file your Response.


As I mentioned above we purposely process our clients cases as a default with written agreement. We do this to save our clients money.

So in the case of our clients, what happens after the FL-165 is filed?

For our clients it is good news.  It is just part of the default with written agreement process we put you through and means the court is actively processing your judgment.


Legal Description Of Property Required On Divorce Judgment |

Legal Description Of Property Required On Divorce Judgment

Tim Blankenship here with and what we’re talking about in this video is legal descriptions for real property.

So were talking about your home, condo, any real property asset that you own.

So when going through a divorce in California, when you submit your judgment to the court and you indicate, for instance, you’re keeping 100% of real property at 123 Main Street. Or,  house will be divided equally or house will be sold and proceeds divided equally.

If you list any type of real property the legal description of property is required on the divorce judgment.

So if it’s your home, obviously you can just get a copy of your deed, make a copy of that, and you will attach that behind the property order as a court will require that to be there to list the legal description

If you turn it in without the legal description, your judgment will be rejected.

Los Angeles County Family Centered Case Resolution Hearings

Los Angeles County Family Centered Case Resolution Hearings

Tim Blankenship here with and what we’re answering in this video is what is Los Angeles County’s Family Centered case resolution hearings that you may see on your summary, on your case summary related to your divorce and this is only for Los Angeles County.

So what happened was people were filing for divorce thinking their divorce cases were finished and never had any communication from the court whatsoever in the past.

And then around 2013 they implemented this family-centered case resolution process. And it’s basically the court setting a hearing and they need to set a hearing at least once every hundred and eighty days in this is just to bring the case before the court to the court, can see what’s going on and then make any recommended solutions to moving your case forward either by sending notices out to come in and court or provide you updates of what needs to happen in order to finish your divorce so they don’t have so many cases not being finished by parties going through divorce on their own.

Santa Clarita Divorce | How To Divide Property In Amicable Divorce |

Santa Clarita Divorce | How To Divide Property In Amicable Divorce |

Tim Blankenship with here and what we’re talking about in this video is how to divide up your property when going through an amicable divorce.

So, the first thing you should know is there are community property laws in California that you can find online that basically explain that anything you guys have acquired during the marriage is community property, which means it’s subject to being divided 50/50.

That said you know use that as the rule know that in making informed decisions but when going through an amicable divorce, you guys get to decide how you really want to do that. Not everything has to be divided down the middle. Each of you can keep your own assets and debts if you decide, that’s not a problem, it does not have to be equal division. The court is not looking for any level of fairness.

They assume if you go through an amicable divorce, we submit a full agreement on your behalf that you guys have notarized they assume you’re doing this knowingly in your best interest and they are completely fine with that.

They are going to accept it, your judgment will be approved and you guys get to call the shots. And that’s one of the biggest benefits of going through an amicable divorce in California.

How Do I Prepare For An Amicable Divorce | Santa Clarita Divorce |

How Do I Prepare For An Amicable Divorce | Santa Clarita Divorce |

Preparing for an amicable divorce is more of a mindset than anything else. The idea is that you want to make decisions in the overall best interest of both parties and not try to win or take advantage of the other party by dealing in good faith.

Tim Blankenship here with and what we’re talking about in this video is how to prepare for an amicable divorce and this really is going to boil down to you and your spouse deciding that you will be amicable and how can you best achieve that some of the tips I would recommend would be like.

Number one, focus on the big picture. Look at the overall nature of the agreement, not each little individual items separately while you can look at it separately, consider them with the overall global Information that you have to utilize.

I would also say negotiate the terms of your divorce agreement in good faith. If you’re trying to win or get a better deal than your spouse and take advantage, that’s definitely not going to be beneficial to the amicable process.

And more importantly is if you have children create a good parenting plan that works for both of you and then which is done in the best interest of the minor children and that will significantly help you get through the amicable divorce process.

Uncontested Divorce Benefits | Santa Clarita Divorce |

Uncontested Divorce Benefits | Santa Clarita Divorce |

There are many benefits to going through an amicable, uncontested divorce in Santa Clarita.


Tim Blankenship here with And in this video I want to talk about the benefits of an uncontested divorce in California.

So there are several the first one would be cost it’s going to be much more cost-effective to go through a divorce through a service like ours in an uncontested fashion where we charge flat fees you don’t have to go to court.

There’s no attorney. Retainers there’s no trials and so forth that’s definitely benefit. Number one is going to be cost. Number two is the speed at which your uncontested divorce can get processed because There’s no court, we bypass all of that processing and go straight to the clerk’s office for approval.

So you’re divorce will be completed within just a couple of weeks to a month or so, obviously, it’s still six months before It’s official in the state of California with the cooling off period. But internally, we can get it done, much quicker.

And thirdly, you guys get to call the shots. You make all the decisions, all the terms of the agreement, there’s no court appearance, we process the entire case for you and it’s all done for one low flat fee.

California Divorce | How To Speed Up The Divorce Process

Many of our clients want us to get their divorce process as quickly as possible.  And I know a lot of people that listen to my podcasts and videos are trying to do their own divorce.

So we often are giving quick tips on how you can do that.  So while there is an information sheet from the courts, on how to process your paperwork is filed, as far as filing the petition serving your spouse doing the disclosures and filing your judgment.

This is a quick tip to help your divorce  get processed by the court faster.  Once you File your petition and have it served and you start the clock on the six-month process all you have to do is wait 30 days after the divorce has been served and then you can turn in all the final paperwork all at the same time, the proof of service the judgment and everything that goes along with the marital settlement agreement and a single shot.

Instead of filing each form separately, if you do it all at once, all after the thirty days have passed the court clerk can process your divorce judgment, that much faster.